#7: The Grudge (2004)

One of the taglines for this movie was something like, “Can you survive The Grudge?” And after Shwam and I walked out of the theatre, I felt as though I was okay, but we joked for a while that she did not survive The Grudge. It was creepy. Yes, I hate Sarah Michelle Gellar. The actors in this movie (well, the ones that were supposed to be alive, at least) were nothing special. Though I did like the sick mother that was being cared for; I thought she conveyed the terror pretty precisely. But the star of the film were the dead. The little boy — Toshio — was creepy as sin. And his mother was just as creepy. Even though they used the startle factor pretty heavily… that’s what you get in horror films nowadays… the things that were used to startle were creepy on their own.

I had nightmares about this more than once, and so I considered this film a rousing success.

Incidentally, I did rent the Japanese version… hated it. Not scary. Nothing about it was even creepy. Proof that those Japanese folks aren’t jaded to horror films the way Americans, sort of including me, are.

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21 Hours at Munich (1976)

Date Watched: October 16, 2010
Source: Netflix Instant Play

I didn’t even know this happened… but hey, I was born in 1983 after all.

This movie was so good it made me want to look up different sources about what really happened, and look into other films made about the events of that day.

I guess that’s about all you can say. The actors were great, of course, especially Franco Nero as the lead terrorist. But ultimately, if you can say that a film encouraged you to learn more, that’s the best it can do, no?

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Léon: The Professional (1994)

Date Watched: October 4, 2010
Source: DVD

What a great movie. It’s about a 12-year-old girl who befriends a professional “cleaner” (read: assassin) after her family is wiped out by a rather insane DEA agent and his “army” of officers.

I don’t know why Natalie Portman always plays some disturbed, abused person, but she does it with some serious flair. She’s easily replaced Winona Ryder as the quirky, downtrodden, my-life-blows actress. Anyway, she plays the 12-year-old — I swear she hasn’t changed a bit — and as usual, she’s excellent. This poor girl, Mathilda, can’t freakin’ catch a break, and consequently, she’s a little twisted upstairs. She ends up believing she’s fallen in love with Léon… a grown man at the very least 20 years her senior… and that’s kind of creepy. But the odd thing is, the relationship they have is sort of sweet. I mean, he’s a hardened hitman who sleeps sitting up, and she’s this smart, sassy, beat-to-hell preteen girl. He avoids the whole in-love deal and protects her like a daughter, teaching her the craft of professional murder, at her insistance, in order for her to avenge the murder of her four-year-old brother.

The ending pissed me off and mushed my heart a little bit at the same time, which automatically means it was a successful ending. Good, but still pissed me off.

Worth the watch, definitely.

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Fair Haired Child (2006)

Date Watched: October 2, 2010
Source: Netflix Instant Play

I’m not sure how I feel about this. On one hand, I was pretty surprised (yet glad) when it was over after only 55ish minutes. But on the other hand, I think if they’d had more time to work with (this was a made-for-TV gem) and it had been a big screen movie, it could have been pretty good.

There are two things that make me say this. The first is the premise. The idea was pretty decent. Nice couple loses their teenage son in a freak accident on his fifteenth birthday. They resort to making a pact with evil to bring him back at an insanely high cost. Not to them, but it’s a freakin lot of work, that’s for sure. Anyway, the second reason is because the creature in this film (I was shocked to see that the image on the box art was actually the same as in the movie) is creepy as hell. I saw it… wasn’t expecting it because usually the art for horror movies is totally misleading and often much better than the movies… and I may have “eep!”ed. And when something makes me “eep!”, it’s usually at least a success. Possibly only a mild success, but a success none-the-less.

Not bad, I suppose. Though, I much prefer the Point Break or Free Willy or even “House M.D.” guest star appearance Lori Petty to this one. This one is… blah.

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The Godfather: Part II (1974)

Date Watched: September 4, 2010
Source: Netflix Instant Play

This is pretty much on par with the first film. I loved watching Michael as a full-fledged Don. He is ruthless, yet fair. He is vicious, yet cool as a cucumber. He is honest, yet incredibly deceitful. Scary, but calming. It’s truly amazing.

I am well aware that it took me almost a week to write a pretty fail review, but again, this is a classic. What else do I have to add? Just my sheer adoration will suffice.

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The Godfather (1972)

Date Watched: September 4, 2010
Source: Netflix Instant Play

I can’t actually sit here and “review” this, so… list!

• I actually had no idea how little Marlon Brando is in this film.
• The horse’s head scene was even better than I thought it would be.  I felt like taking a shower afterward.
• How awesome was the fight scene between Sonny and his sister’s husband?  I can’t decide which I like better… that one, or the scene in Goodfellas when Henry beats Karen’s neighbor with the pistol.  Both of them were pretty darned funny.
• Guess who never wants to go through a toll booth ever again?  Yeah.  That’d be me
• Al Pacino was scrumptious in this movie.
• Appollonia was gorgeous.  I loved her wedding dress.  And I was SO.  PISSED.  when she… well, when that thing happened to her.  (Just in case there might be some other human out there who hasn’t seen this movie yet).
• The scene in the very beginning with the old guy singing in Italian at Vito’s daughter’s wedding was hysterical.
• I felt really bad for poor Luca Brasi.  He was such a dope, and the whimpering during… well, that thing… made me sad.  Poor guy.
• How freaking amazing was Michael’s transformation from meek war hero, distanced from the family business, to being the Don?  Incredible.  Pacino truly is the master.

There’s so much more I could say, but I think I might have been the last person in civilization who hadn’t seen The Godfather, so I’m not saying anything you all don’t already know.  But DAMN what a terrific 3 hours.

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Thr3e (2007)

Date Watched: August 28, 2010
Source: Netflix Instant Play

Sigh…

I wanted to like this one too. I was disappointed by the ending. Not only was it completely typical and unoriginal, but I don’t think it was done well at all.

Oh, and Marc Blucas? Not a fan. He’s exactly what everyone accuses Keanu Reeves of being; the same character every time.

That’s about all I can muster up for this one. Very unmemorable. I actually had to re-read the description on Netflix to remember what movie this was.

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Fargo (1996)

Date Watched: August 25, 2010
Source: Netflix Instant Play

I won’t lie and say that this movie didn’t confuse me just a bit. It was a totally weird hybrid between humor and horrible. The plot itself is horrible, and the things that happen are horrible, but there is definite humor too. You feel bad for laughing because there are dead people everywhere, and yet it’s funny. How the hell else are you going to explain Steve Buschemi being in this kind of a movie? I thought it was serious, so his name confused me. I was giggling in the first few minutes though… took a minute to get used to.

But I rather enjoyed it. Typical plot: Guy hires people to kidnap his wife to collect a ransom from her rich father because he needs the money and is afraid to ask for it. They do a really good job with all the horrible, but they inject just enough humor in it that you can’t help but laugh.

Definitely an enjoyable evening.

Sleepers (1996)

Date Watched: August 23, 2010
Source: Netflix Instant Play

This movie was so damned sad.

It was sad on two levels. The story itself was tragic and horrible and disturbing, and the ending was certainly depressing as hell (partial spoiler, maybe?) but the problem is that this could have been EXCELLENT. The story… everything is there. It has all it needs to really blow the viewer out of the water, and it just didn’t. I can’t really tell you why it didn’t, it just didn’t. DeNiro deserved a bigger part, I will say that much. Hands down, he’s excellent, but he’s too big for a relatively small part. Sure his character was the most important part of the ending, but still.

I’m fully acknowledging the poorness of this post. But without spoilers or any solid reason why it didn’t thrill me the way I think it had potential to, I don’t have a whole lot to say. Maybe I just need to watch it again.

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The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day (2009)

Date Watched: August 22, 2010
Source: Netflix Instant Play

I loved this one almost as much as I loved the first one. There were definitely more comedic scenes in this one, but it still balanced very well with the storyline and the gratuitous violence. Clifton Collins was just plain hysterical… even better than their hapless Italian sidekick from the first movie. His choice of weapons was pretty damned funny.

And the silenced Desert Eagles? Excessive maybe, but damned cool.

Love.

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